THE SIDECAR

I don't know why it's taken us so long to follow Auntie Mame's notion of a good breakfast ("Tell Ito to make me a very light breakfast, black coffee and a Sidecar") but now that we know the allure of that drink we're sold on it for any time of the day. You would be too:

1 part Cointreau
1 part fresh lemon juice
3 parts Brandy

Chill martini glass while putting together ingredients above in shaker. Add lots of ice cubes. Shake for 20 seconds or until shaker is frosted. Strain on frosted martini glass. Consider calling Ul Yulu to re-do your living room while sipping.

THE GROOM WAS PRETTIER THAN THE BRIDE

"I think it's about time John Derek got a leading lady at least half as good-looking as he is. No one, male or female, could be better looking. But if he were teamed with luscious Liz Taylor, she could probably hold her own! So far, John Derek has made all of his leading ladies look sick!" -- Lois J. Boyd, Streator, Ill.
(Letters to Photoplay magazine, 1952)

WHAT SHOULD I DO? Your Problems Answered by Claudette Colbert

Dear Miss Colbert:
I have finally been asked to join a club at school I have wanted to belong for a long time. One of my very best friends was invited to join, so she asked to have me initiated too. For initiation each girl has to do something difficult. One girl had to locate two eight-cent airmail stamps. She borrowed them from a stamp collector. Another girl had to have a deck of cards autographed by a minister. Luckily, her uncle is a minister, but the girls didn't know that.
Here is what I have to do: ask you to send me a black wig exactly like Hedy Lamarr's hair. If you can't do this I can't become a member of the club, so I know you won't let me down. --Ellie E.

Dear Ellie:
I feel there is something to be said on high school clubs of this sort and I might as well say it. In California, high school clubs are strictly forbidden unless they have a definite and clear-cut purpose approved by the faculty and supervised by them, such as collecting toys for underprivileged children, and in general contributing something constructive to the community. A club that forces new members to do humiliating and foolish things isn't a club to which I would want a younger sister or a niece of mine to join.
Besides, it would be impossible to find a wig as beautiful as Hedy Lamarr's hair; there isn't such a thing. -- Claudette Colbert

-- Photoplay magazine, 1952

...because when you're Suzy Parker it doesn't matter how you wear your hair...

The beautiful Universal lucite logo was recently used in "Changeling." Even in a digitized version, it was worth all the tzures that followed.

SHE'S GOT BETTE DAVIS THIGHS

"In 1947 Bette Davis' tenure as the first lady of Warner Brothers was drawing to a close. Since 1932 her [wardrobe for] films had been designed almost exclusively by the brilliant and hot-tempered Orry-Kelly. "She didn't like him as a person but she kept using him because she knew she needed him," recalls Milo Anderson.

Her figure had several serious problems: bowed legs, very round shoulders, and a long and broad neck. Worst of all were her breasts, which hung almost to her waist. She refused to wear brassieres with underwire because she thought that the wire would cause breast cancer. When strapless bras became available, Kelly bought one and tried to get her to wear it, but she threw it at him. If Kelly pulled up on the straps too much her shoulders ached and the breasts simply doubled over.

Sometimes Kelly just let the breasts fall as they would and hid them in the unfitted waistline of a dress. But usually he lifted them as much as possible and tried to find new and different ways of camouflaging the situation with optical illusions. Short sleeves on a blouse or dress usually end at the middle of the upper arm, but Kelly brought Davis' sleeves down to the elbow so that they would be on the same level as the bottom of her bust. He often put white handkerchiefs in her breast pockets or corsages to draw the eye up. "Oh, give me some new way to break her bust!" he moaned one day to his assistant.". -- from Edith Head: The Life and Times of Hollywood's Celebrated Costume Designer by David Chierichetti

HELENA RUBINSTEIN LIKED HER PICTURE PAINTED

The Empress of Cosmetology was painted by just about every significant artist of her time, including Vertes, Dali and Duffy. The one that got away was Picasso, who worked on a painting for many months but didn't complete it because he thought that if he finished it meant he would die first. "The devil," she called him.

SHELLEY & JANET: WISE UP!

NOT BEAUTIFUL
How does Shelley Winters rate the big publicity build-up Hollywood always offers? Sure she has sex appeal. What shapely girl doesn't? But as for looks -- she's out!
I haven't met one person yet who thinks she's beautiful. And I've never seen an actress with such messy hair. If Hollywood can spend so much publicity on her, why don't they put her wise to a hairdresser? -- Mrs. Emily Bortel, Grand Rapids, Ohio.

IMMODEST
Why doesn't someone wise up Janet Leigh and some of the other younger stars about some of their indecent evening dresses? In my opinion they are a disgrace to the female sex. You never see any of the older stars like Loretta Young, Irene Dunne and Barbara Stanwyck wearing daring evening dresses. They use their heads for more than just a hat rack! -- Janet Robey, Detroit, Michigan.

Letters to the Editor, Motion Picture magazine, 1954

A REGULAR VANDAL-A!

THE GUEST NO ONE INVITES AGAIN IS:

* A LAZY DAISY
* A LEM-ME GIRL
* A PLAIN JANE

THAT CAMERA she's toting on a tippy-canoe ride: It's expensive; it belongs to her hostess. Like the swim suit she's wearing -- and the tennis racket she'll use later. Don't be a lem-me girl ("lend me" this or that). When visiting, bring your own sports props; why inconvenience your friends -- or risk being dubbed a vandal? Dodge calendar-time risks, too. You get safety you trust with Kotex, for this extra absorbent napkin gives protection that doesn't fail! -- From an ad in Movie Life magazine, 1954.

A STRONG DISLIKE FOR JOANIE

"JOAN Fontaine makes the hit parade in a social sense, for she is gay, gregarious, charming and witty and is invited to all the finest parties in town. But she is alleged to be almost hated by a certain group of -- her leading men!
HER fellow actors claim she's utterly ruthless and that she knows every way in which a leading woman can spoil an actor's lines -- and uses them!
ANY picture made with Joan means a constant battle for the leading man to get his face into the picture, and they end up with a strong dislike for Joanie." -- Motion Picture magazine, 1951

GOD GIVETH THE SHOULDER...

"I thought if I played an erudite, articulate person who was multifaceted and who was struggling between the maculine and the feminine sides of his/her nature that this was a great opportunity to do lots of amazing things as an actress. I was really attuned to the fact that I really needed to do something that showed that I had more ability than I was given credit for at that time -- that I wasn't just a body and a face."

--Racquel Welch recalling her role in MYRA BRECKENRIDGE.

FOR THOSE WHO BELIEVE LIFE IS NEVER FUN

WHAT WOULD CARY GRANT DO?

"Cary never gave autographs, but his turn-downs of requests for them were such studies in charm that I often thought they served as come-ons even to people who knew wouldn't actually get one. In any case, this proved itself on this occasion -- and, as usual, Cary was up to the challenge. To one woman who gushed 'My friends will never believe I met you unless...,' Cary gently interrupted, 'You mean you have friends like that? You really shouldn't.' To a man who began, 'I hate to bother you, but...,' Cary's interruption was firmer. 'Don't ever,' he advised, 'do anything you hate.' And finally, to a third man, who started 'My wife will kill me...,' Cary was also admonitory. 'Tsk, tsk,' he smiled. 'You really shouldn't have that kind of relationship -- it's too dangerous.'"-- Cleveland Amory on having drinks with Cary Grant at the Polo Lounge. From his book "The Cat Who Came For Christmas."

MY RULES FOR ROMANCE ARE...(#3)

CLAUDETTE COLBERT:" I'm strictly of the old school. I think the bad taste some girls flaunt by their intimate confidences is even worse than indiscriminate love-making, if possible! Men are more decent -- most men wouldn't think of discussing the girl who had their affection." -- Photoplay magazine, 1943

AMONG THE LESSER PEOPLE

HOLLYWOOD is far less than enthusiastic about another of the fans' favorites, June Allyson. They say June has a habit of acting indifferent to those who work on her sets, that she often forgets to say hello to the grips, and that she's been guilty of being less than cordial to those who knew her when.
WHILE JUNE may not be a glowing favorite among the lesser people in Hollywood, she's very popular in the upper-bracket social set in which she travels. This is due, in part, to the social prestige of her husband, Dick Powell, who introduced her to the Leonard Firestones, the Edgar Bergens, the Justin Darts and others who rate high socially. And with these people June is warm and gay and thoughtful! -- From Motion Picture magazine, 1951

AND WHO'S CLAIRE TREVOR PLAYING?

THEY MEET ON AN ADVENTURE THAT SPANS THE 2400 MILES FROM HONOLULU TO SAN FRANCISCO BAY. OUT OF THIS MEETING OF STRANGERS COMES ENTERTAINMENT HISTORY, THE STORY OF EVERY KIND OF LOVE THERE IS !

LYDIA: Who was as low as high society could get!
CHILDS: A wealthy collector -- of other men's wives!
MAY: Strictly a night-time woman!
NELL: Still burning with honeymoon fever!
DAN: Who had used up his nine lives, and was starting on ten!
SALLY: Who lived in a world of whistles!

--from an ad in Movie Life magazine, 1954

VERA, HONEY!

"Sometimes Hollywood's no different than any other boy-meets-girl town. When I asked Rock Hudson why Vera-Ellen was dating A.C. Lyles every night, Rock said "Well, you see, I'm trying to save some money." Vera, honey, I didn't realize you were so expensive!" -- Motion Picture magazine, 1951

REMEMBERING RONA BARRETT

from “When Watching TV You Can Be Sure of Seeing…” in “Mad” October 1972

TRY ALL 3

DOES THAT VERY SWISH SHINDIG CALL FOR:

• A new hairdo?
• Your usual style?

Yah -- you look different, all right, with that new siren-ish chignon! In fact you're a "stranger" in Harry's eyes -- so now you feel unsure. A special occasion's no time to try new hairdo tricks. But at "that" time, it's no trick to be sure about whether Regular, Junior or Super Kotex suits you best. Try all 3. Each size has chafe-free softness, holds its shape!
--From an ad in Movie Life magazine, 1954.

A DIANA DORS STORY

Ms. Dors was born in a small town in the north of England. Her birth name was Diana Fluck.

In the mid-'50s, she was tapped by Hollywood as a Marilyn Monroe rival. She still had one English picture awaiting release before she departed. Her studio decided to premiere the film in her home town as the feature event of a Diana Dors Homecoming Day to celebrate her departure.

The mayor arranged to have bleachers set up in the town square, erected a stage and hired a local band for the event -- all part of a ceremony in which he would present her with the key to the city. In preparing his speech, he was very conscious of making the obvious mistake in pronouncing her name and rehearsed the presentation endlessly. "Diana Fluck. Diana Fluck. Fluck. Fluck. Fluck. Fluck. Fluck."

The big day arrives. Flags are flying, the band is playing, the bleachers are filled and the mayor is standing on the stage awaiting the star's arrival. A black Bentley quietly pulls into the square from which emerges Ms. Dors dressed in a red scoop-neck peasant blouse, gold toreador pants and wedgies. She insinuates herself up the stairs to the stage where the mayor waits with a giant key to the city.

The mayor is nonplused. He has never seen such a voluptuous vision and is clearly rattled by her. The band stops playing, the citizens hush and he begins his speech, unable to keep his dazzled eyes from straying from his prepared text to ogle her.

"Ladies and Gentlemen," he begins, then sneaks the first of several peeks at the blonde goddess. "Today we have with us one of England's greatest stars who will soon be departing for a brilliant new career in Hollywood."

He cops another surreptitious glance at Dors, then continues.

"Moviegoers all over the world know her as Diana Dors. But those of you who have grown up in our town will always remember her as..."

He takes an anxious breath and, tremblingly, gazes at her once more.

"...our own Diana Clunt."

-- As told by the still-mourned but never-forgotten Joel E. Siegel (aka MovieMan on Songbirds.)

TALLU & MAE STORIES

ONE OF THE (arguably) endearing eccentricities of the late/great Tallulah Bankhead was a penchant for flashing. During the making of Hitchcock's 1944 LIFEBOAT some members of the cast got together and reported to Hitch that it had become very distracting having Tallu make it clear that she had no use for underwear. Hitch paused for a moment, then, thinking out loud, said "Well, I don't know if this is a problem for costume, hair and makeup or props."

DURING AN EARLY 1960s run of her play SEXTET at the Coconut Grove Playhouse, Miss West, always the gracious star, made time after the show to greet the fans and sign autographs. When a young man approached her and gushed the usual compliments, he added that he had just seen SHE DONE HIM WRONG at the Museum of Modern Art in New York. Mae, blinked once or twice and said "Museum? What do you mean museum?"

WHETHER IT'S DANCING OR BOWLING OR WHATEVER...

WHEN A BLIND DATE'S DISAPPOINTING, WOULD YOU:

• Back out gracefully?
• Make like a martyr?
• Grin and bear it?

Your blind date's gruesome? Grin and bear it! Even stupor-man has feelings. Besides, he probably has friends...dream-beam material you'll get to know, in time. So stay in the picture; whether it's dancing, bowling or whatever. And on calendar days let Kotex keep you comfortable, with out-of-this-world softness that lasts because Kotex is made to stay soft while you wear it.

JUST AS SPEEDY!

"RACE GENTRY says he was born lucky. When he was 12, he found $125 in an old drain pipe. When he was 17, agent Henry Wilcox drove into the gas station where he was working and said: "Would you like to be in pictures?" A few months later he found himself playing with Rock Hudson at UI in The Lawless Breed, and he's still there, doing very nicely. His latest is Black Horse Canyon.
Race was born John Papiro, son of an Italian jewelry manufacturer, in Los Angeles on February 23, 1934. The name Race is more appropriate, for he grew up to be a hot rod enthusiast. Except for dates with many gals, racing is still his favorite fun. Fans predict stardom will be just as speedy!" -- Movie Life, 1954

BUT WET SHE'S TERRIFIC!

"THE OTHER DAY Esther Williams, having broken four dates for a publicity layout, arrived an hour late, much to the annoyance of a half-dozen people who'd been waiting for her.
Esther appears to be too much concerned with herself and her family to care much about the other fellow. She blithely goes her own way, suiting things to her own convenience, even if her actions may hurt others who have to take second place to her.
ANOTHER THING, many people think Esther talks too much about her money and her shrewd financial investments. Maybe it's just plain jealousy, but everyone seems to get a little irked at the way she brags about her ability to pyramid money. Some say if she lost some of that smugness she'd be very popular, indeed, for she has the qualities of humor and humanness to make her a wonderful person." -- Motion Picture and Television Magazine, 1951

MY RULES FOR ROMANCE ARE...(#2)

"When I married Pev Marley, I was thankful that there was nothing in my past that I would be ashamed of. Remember, regardless of what men say to you, they will never, in their hearts, respect you if you make yourself cheap!" -- Linda Darnell, Photoplay Magazine, 1943

YOU FIGURE THEM OUT!

It now can be told that Arlene Dah's departure from the Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer fold was something more than her yen to make her marriage with Lex Barker work! She had been sticking her beautiful tongue at the studio since no musicals were assigned to her as a follow-up to "Three Little Words." So Arlene up and said three little words to her bosses. You figure them out!-- Overheard in Hollywood, 1951

MAKE ROOM FOR MOURNING

Gale Storm, who shot to the top on television as the vivacious star of two popular 1950s situation comedies, "My Little Margie" and "The Gale Storm Show: Oh! Susanna," has died. She was 87.

FARLEY'S PLACE

One of the gags around Hollywood for a long time was that Farley
Granger would never marry Shelley Winters because he didn't want to
give up his one-room bachelor diggings in Laurel Canyon. And we're
beginning to think there's a lot of truth in the story.
It's strictly a man's hideout, of course, and maybe some of you
girls wouldn't like the casual air of the place -- casual meaning
comfortable, man-style, with magazines strewn around haphazardly,
records piled up on the phonograph, and an all-around atmosphere of
being actively lived.
Farley, who was working on "Strangers on a Train" at the time,
refused to comment when we asked him if this would be home for him
and Shelley Winters after their marriage. He just looked at us for a
long moment, smiled, and said: "How do you like my paintings?"
-- Motion Picture and Television Magazine, 1951

THE GEORGE NADER STORY

Here is a genial, handsome, uncomplicated guy who is actually so complicated that no one, including George Nader can figure him out. As a result, girls like Dani Crayne, Barbara Rush and Martha Hyer find that attention from Nader builds up to an awful let-down. Dani, especially, was tagged as the future Mrs. George Nader. But as the marriage rumors began, the romance ended. Nader is one of the most likeable guys in town. But, we think, he still likes his cats better than he likes most people.

-- Carl York's Gossip of Hollywood, Photoplay 1957

WHAT SHOULD I DO? Your Problems Answered by Bette Davis

Dear Miss Davis:

I am twenty years old and have a sister seventeen. My parents died a few years ago and I support both of us. 

This is the problem: She imagines herself to be in love with John Payne. She has our rooms full of pictures of him until I can't bear the sight of his face. She has covered all our relatives' pictures with a picture of him. She never misses a movie he is in and lately has been spending everything she earns on magazines in which there is a picture of him.

I find her sitting in front of the mirror acting as if he were there. She pretends she is his girl friend and even his wife. She doesn't go out with any other boys -- she just moons over him.

This has gone on for a year now. Can you tell me what I can do to end this silly infatuation. I've tried taking her to see other stars, but she still holds on to him.

Yours in disgust,

-- Jeanne W.

Dear Miss W:

You have signed yourself "yours in disgust" and I think perhaps that is the whole trouble. It is possible your ridicule of your sister's devotion for Mr. Payne only incites her further, out of stubborness. If this situation really worries you, why not rave about Mr. Payne even more than she does and pin up twice as many pictures? This shouldn't be too much of a trial as Mr. Payne is a very attractive man. 

It is certainly far healthier for your sister to admire a man of Mr. Payne's caliber, who is remote from her, than a boy she could see all the time. Her admiration of Mr. Payne will probably make her fussier about any beau she eventually chooses. 

Sincerely,

-- Bette Davis

MY RULES FOR ROMANCE ARE...

"I think necking is dangerous. You can have just as much fun with a bunch as you can have alone with a boy. When you get older and fall madly in love with someone you'll be sorry if you've been on the unfastidious side. What's more, necking can become a habit so that it doesn't matter who the man is." -- DOROTHY LAMOUR

FLAT AFFAIR

This is a movie that makes you realize how hard it must be to make a movie because this one should have been fool-proof and it fails almost frame by frame. It bears the most superficial resemblance to the original with Charles Boyer and Irene Dunne and the remake (AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER) in 1957 with Cary Grant and Debohra Kerr.

With the exception of Gary Shandling and then hearing Kate Hepburn say "fuck a duck," there's not an ounce of humor in the movie. Nor is there emotion. I mean, if you're going to cut the comedy, then let the melodrama run on all cylinders. Instead we have the romance of two very dreary people whose only common attraction is that their former mates were drearier. When we see Benning after the accident, while Beatty is still waiting up in the Empire State building, she can't even talk, she has to send yes or no messages by blinking. Why? Debohra Kerr was in HYSTERICS shouting "Nick, I have to go meet Nick!" Is it true those in charge in Hollywood think people can't take anything so lacking in cool as someone screaming for their lives?

WHATEVER HAPPENED TO MARNIE?

That's the question that hangs almost from the start in this very mannered, very purple story by Alfred Hitchcock. By comparison it makes VERTIGO as conventional as NOTORIOUS. "Tippi" Hedren (yes, I never noticed her name is billed in quotes) beats the part down just to show it who's in charge. And, for an odd character in the midst of really dreary people, she's the only one acting in a realistic way. Sean Connery and Diane Baker give very bad imitations of Dana Andrews and Lizabeth Scott. And I think that's the problem with MARNIE. It's noir and needed to be told against the black and white backdrop of the 1940s. Maybe with Lana Turner, Otto Preminger directing.

There's almost no humor, though a very funny line Marnie gets off when the Baker character asks her how she takes her tea ("In hot water, with a tea bag") is barely audible. There is unintentional humor in the Very Serious performance of Louise Latham as Marnie's mother. Her hair and make-up along with certain facial and vocal mannerisms makes me wonder if Carol Burnette didn't pick up some ideas here for the harridan Bernice she played in The Family segments of the her tv show. Strangely enough, Latham's character in MARNIE is also named Bernice!

When we do find out whatever happened to Marnie, it gets pretty engrossing, though, as in the end of PSYCHO, there's much made of tiding up lose ends with clinical, quasi Freudan explanations (by Connery). The one captivating part of MARNIE (besides the up-to-snuff Bernard Herrmann score) are the many visual takes of Marnie's hair, specifically the BACK of Marnie's hairdos. I knew this showed up in VERTIGO too, so I Googled for an answer and found this neat page that gives a good overview of what must have been one of Hitch's darkest and depraved secrets. Sad to say, he took it to the grave with him:

http://www.brightlightsfilm.com/42/hair.htm

MY FAIR DEBUTANTE

Just watched MY FAIR LADY, I think, for the first time, that is, straight through. And the stars and the Cecil Beaton's settings are really marvelous. But the story is inteeeerrrrrminable. Amazing what capacity for time and space we had once upon a time. It was the same when I watched an old episode of the David Frost TV show from the 70s. There they were, Yvonne de Carlo and Alexis Smith, telling long stories in complete sentences. And because even I have fallen in step with our clipped modern tempo, I watched with apprehension afloat, thinking someone was not going to be able to get out of the sentence or the story they were telling.

Only flaw with MFL is the obvious, jarring way Marni Nixon comes on whenever Audrey sings. She looks lovely and acts the hell out of the part. But, ah, if only Jack Warner had taken a chance on Julie Andrews, the movie would have gotten double acting Oscar honors. What a joke that was on him when she won the award that night for MARY POPPINS. I remember Harrison accepting his award and thanking his "two Fair Ladies."

My darling THE RELUCTANT DEBUTANTE has just come on TCM. That is another rare bird they don't hatch any more. True, honest to goodness cool wit and style in every square of inch of it, from the writing to the high-comedy acting, to Vincente Minnelli's razor sharp direction, to ultra lux Pierre Balmain clothes for Kay Kendall. And Kay Kendall. The only funny woman in the movies who was also a great beauty, with great sweetness and a kind of goodness that permeated her every move. Even "the kids," John Saxon and Sandra Dee pick up on the suave signals and do themselves proud. And what a sexy man was John Saxon. He really smolders in this.'

Some happy/not so happy endings from this cast. Kay Kendall was already fighting lukemia and she died a few short years later. Lansbury was yet to do many more years of yeoman's work before she broke out of the supporting mold and became an overnight Broadway star when she opened in MAME. Sandra Dee became an alcoholic and a recluse toward the end of her life. Rex Harrison kept on a rich and rewarding career till very late, till the very end of life. I don't know what became of John Saxon, but something tells me he married Well and lives in a temperate climate with servants.

I met Sandra Dee once in the mid 70s when she was appearing in something like AGATHA SUE, I LOVE YOU! (or was it THE PAISLEY CONVERTIBLE?) at a dinner theatre in Chicago. This was the beginning of the end of her A-list fame and the start of a retreat from the world. I met Harrison signing autographs outside a Broadway theatre where I had just seen him and Stewart Granger and Glynnis Johns in THE CIRCLE, a Somerset Maugham play that you thought every other minute was going to give a seizure of ecstasy because it was so exquisitely drenched in a self-assured elegance i knew we were probably watching for the last time. And I think we did.

THE HOURS

Maybe 300 used DVDs at the used books store, and the only one I could take home was THE HOURS. Which I already have in NY. But which seemed like just the right dish for the state of mental and physical exhaustion I was in. And it was. Not as disturbing as I remember my first viewing of it in a NY theatre, where I was so worn out from the upheaval that I had to stay in my seat long after the closing credits ended. I remember leaving the theatre, going down the escalators, knees buckling. Well, nothing like that on this viewing. But it's still a deeply disturbing and very beautiful movie.

I had forgotten that the Julianne Moore character is pregnant and that it's (one of) the reason for her wanting to do away with herself. I had forgotten that all 3 women kiss other women in each of their segments, all out a desperate and nearly unimaginable loneliness. I had forgotten that food plays such an important role in all 3 segments. I had forgotten David Hare's script is so precise, a word that doesn't readily come to mind when I think of David Hare. I should like to read Michael Cunningham's book again very soon, see how it was re-stiched for the movies.

I should like to read MRS. DALLAWAY, or rather, try to read MRS. DALLAWAY again. I tried several years back and didn't get very far. But in the special features of the DVD of THE HOURS, Michael Cunningham says that the book is "an ordinary day in the life of an ordinary person as told by a genius. And at the end of the book you realize that everything you need to know about human life is contained in any day of anyone's life."

OSCARS 2008 THOUGHTS

• All those awards for NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN, and it's the same movie the Coen brothers made 12 years ago, the one called FARGO. Meanwhile, a really human, great piece of filmmaking, ATONEMENT, barely gets a nod for original soundtrack.

• Did Marion Cotillard have a speech prepared at all? Why can't the non-English speaking contenders know enough to be ready with a few words? Or in her case, at least honor Piaf for inspiring the movie and her performance. "You rock my life" wasn't quite it.

• I'm definitely flat out of the loop. I didn't know who 75% of the presenters were.

• All the women were dressed in the best of taste, makeup and jewelry, head to toe. But they were all going strapless and looked like they were dressed by one person. The only women whose clothes told you something about themselves were Tilda Swinton and JUNO's writer Diablo Cody, a name obviously meant to be lived up to. Her outfit turned out to be by Dior. But Dior-on-acid compared to Cameron Diaz's baby-pink dream and demure Dior. Diablo took one for a moment in time, back to the old Cher appearances, when one could never guess what she'd turn up in. Diablo's coda as she was finally swept off the stage by emotion was a thanks to her family for loving her exactly the way she is. Boy, was I was jealous.

• The Best Song FALLING SLOWLY is made up of 4 notes. But I was bored even before the granola couple started. Folkies are back, if this couple is any example of it. Damn dressing for the occasion or even combing your hair. Do I sound like my parents now? Anyway, all the songs were dreary, even the one with a gospel beat. Johnny Mercer, Harold Arlen, Jimmy McHugh, I could hear you all collectively turning in your graves.

• There's usually one real and poignant moment in the show every year. Tonight it was Javier Bardem, lapsing into Spanish and dedicating his award to his mother (in the audience) and family and to Spain. There was a third instance of winners thanking parents, Daniel Day Lewis and the composer of ATONEMENT did as well.

• Another moment came later when a 98 year old production designer received a special award and gave a slow, measured speech, which probably made for the only suspense in the whole evening. We're really too conditioned by too many soundbites these days to know how to deal with complete sentences.

• Julie Christy, the one bona-fide Star in the room, and all she did was seat in the audience. But maybe she declined participation. The red carpet man obviously didn't know his ass from his elbow and spent the12 second segment on Sara Polley, ignoring Julie Christy, looking pleasant and composed, like she was waiting to get a ride home after the interview was over.

• No Legends presenting or receiving tonight. No Loretta Young or Olivia de Havilland. I suspect, with a heavy heart, that there are none left. Well, there's always Cyd Charisse, and she still looks sensational. Good thing Debohra Kerr got her Oscar just in time.

• It would have been too much to expect that either Ruby Dee or Hal Holbrook would win. But these are the dark horses (no offense, Ruby) that sometimes come through when the vote between the usual suspects get split.

• Passe thought it may be in 2008, it was still a feel-good moment when Scott Rudin thanked his partner and called him "honey" in front of a billion people.

BESS FLOWERS: EXTRA SPECIAL HOLLYWOOD EXTRA

TCM ROCKS

Thank god for Turner Classic Movies. It's my harbor in the storm. All that's wrong with life is swept away by the magic of the great movies of the past, uncut and commercial free, as they like to brag. It's not just what they program, but the way the movies are connected by an unceassing parade of bios, shorts, trailers and interviews. It's not a network, it's a universe. It lives in the past and it makes it gloriously alive. Now, if I could only learn how to do that.

Tonight I tuned in the middle of I REMEMBER MAMA, a great movie, so beautifully directed by George Stevens. I remember seeing this in a revival house in San Francisco, where the film takes place, with Michael Strong. We loved it so. We laughed so hard when Ellen Corby blurts out "The mail must go through!" when she meant "The show must go on!"

LOST AND FOUND

"Sometimes all I want is for someone to tell me that eveything is going to be all right. I want someone to tell me this over and over again in a sweet but firm voice, the way you would tell it to a child crying in the dark after a nightmare about a hairy green monster under the bed. I want someone to tell me this often enough to banish my doubts and make me believe it."
-- Diane Schemperlen, OUR LADY OF THE LOST AND FOUND.

This novel is about a writer who one day, quite unexpectedly gets a visit from the Virgin Mary. Mary shows up at her front door, not levitating and radiating a glow of stars off her head, but wearing a trench coat, white running shoes, a large leather purse and holding the extended metal handle of a small suitcase on wheels. I need a place to stay for a week, she says, I am so tired, I need a break. The writer is no more startled than if an appealing stranger had made the request. And gut instinct tells her this stranger is not making things up.

Mary and the writer settle down to a cozy, girly time, making lunch together (Mary insists on doing the dishes,) driving to the mall (where she makes a withdrawal at the ATM) and spending evenings with Mary sharing deetails of her visitations over the centuries in the same nostalgic tone one would use to describe a lifetime of Carnival cruises.

The writer is motivated by this extraordinary visit to look into the history of the Saints on her own. Her descriptions (Ms. Schemperlen's, that is) are also couched in gossipy, off the cuff, page-turning style. Sandwiched along the way, are the writer's introspective takes on her own issues with doubt and faith, faith and reason, faith and fear and despair. And wether they are really opposites or can one make better sense of life if we accept them as a package deal.

There's another quote I liked, which brings up my own doubts and inconsistancies about embracing the Buddhhist's way of disregarding anything but the present moment, of shoving aside all projections of past and future. I couldn't have said it better:

"Sometimes I feel completely defeated by the daily struggle of trying to understand, of trying to be mature, responsible, happy, and good. Sometimes I long to throw off the yoke of reason, to crawl out from under what Cervantes called 'the melancholy burden of sanity.' Sometimes I want to get out of the way, stop trying so hard, and just let things happen."

THEY BROKE THE MOLD AFTER THELMA RITTER

THE ONE AND ONLY THELMA RITTER

The Edmonton Film Society showed "All About Eve," which I could probably get up and recite playing all the parts from beginning to end. Again, I'm thrown into a space with people past their 60s and I think "ah, an older crowd," like I'm Gregg Kinear or something. I don't relate to "older people" as peers. I don't know if that's denial or I just don't see myself reflected in the way they come across. All that aside, it was great fun to watch "Eve" with an audience, less sophisticated than NY, and notice what they found funny and what went straight over their heads, like my favorite line "If she can act she may not be bad. And she looks like she could burn down a plantation."

As always, the great Thelma Ritter makes everyone's scenes shine. And since this is the second time in two entries that she's come up, I think it's good that I post a picture of the old girl.

THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING DORIAN

I've been putting off having a blog for so long, I wish I'd done it a year ago when I moved here from New York City. Here is Edmonton in Alberta, Canada. There was a LOT to post and, maybe, I can create a "Flashback" section here where I'll publish copies of my emails to others during that time, a kind of retro diary.

But that was then, and now it's a rainy Saturday night and I'm waiting for laundry to dry while a piece of salmon is in the oven and from the periphery I watch parts of "The Picture of Dorian Grey" on TCM.

TCM is one of the reasons I continue to keep in one piece while living here. It was the only TV I watched in NY, and now it provides comfort, continuity and entertainment I can't get anywhere else. I remember coming home one miserable day when I felt like a cranky, lonely puppy and turning on TCM to watch THE VERY START of "The Model and the Marriage Broker," one of my favorite all-time movies, the only time the great Thelma Ritter had a featured role. Who needs crack?

Tonight TCM was running an Oscar Wilde programme (sorry, the spelling conventions up here have gotten to me) and I watched parts of "The Importance of Being Earnest" and "An Ideal Husband." "Earnest" is always a treat because Edith Evans and Margaret Rutterford never fail to make me laugh out loud -- and this is the rarest thing that a movie can do for me. "Husband" plays on the heavy-handed side. Only fun is watching Paulette Goddard negotiate the demanding Cecil Beaton gowns.

Laundry must be dry by now. Salmon almost done. What to do first, what to do?